Wednesday, 28 July 2010

green fingers... yup. from squashing bloody caterpillars, like.

I really keep trying my best at this greenery-growing-on-the-balcony-lark. But the bloody evil green caterpillars keep coming back (and I have moved house) to eat up my bloody plants. Bloody hell, I had to get rid of my basil, chives, parsley and lavender yesterday. For chrissake, I'm not the best of urban gardeners as it is. This is not helping.

So, apart from crunching (bollocks) and unsuccessfully (bollocks) trying to replant the broken (bollocks) branch where one tiny little cherry tom was starting to appear (double bollocks), I reckon I've saved the tomato plant.

It was given to me about two weeks ago. This is me carrying it on the bike basket that night.
Quality photography. Warning: It may cause drowsiness.
I was in motion, so was the bike and there was no light.
However, it is much better than the first one I tried to take. Look:
Wey hey. How pretty is that! My bike light going all sparkle mad.

This is what one end of the balcony looked like last week (I wanted to show the extremely impressive growth of above-pictured plant to its generous previous owners.)
Anyway, the tomato plant is a good 10 cm. higher now (that's about 4" for you non-metric nutters) minus one branch sporting one minute tomatito plus a bunch of squiggly green bastard caterpillars.
Bastard things, trying to charm me with their circus flourishes and curlicues. They had to go. Unfortunately all my herbs had to go with them. Bastards.

Well, I'm happy the olive tree is going strong and so is the black-eyed Susan vine. I also planted some random flowers that were supposed to be coming out by now, but haven't seen much colourful progress on those yet. Oh well... End of boring green post. Nearly.

I reckon next time I see caterpillars I'm going to try and pimp them just like Antonia does her snails (always in a responsible and well-informed manner, bien sur.) Any ideas? Aimee? Jen? You wouldn't happen to have any random tutorials on the subject kicking about, would you?

You say tomato, I say tomato.


  1. what about squishing them in a folded sheet of paper, to create rorschach inkblots?!

  2. oh my lord! i thought you were asking me for gardening advice - i can assure you that would be the first time in the history of me that such a question has ever been popped. nearly everything i've ever tried to grow, i've managed to kill - so you are one step ahead of me, sister. caterpillars or not, you have things growing on your balcony. that is progress.

    as for doing something artsy with the moving creatures, i think all i'd recommend is some very un-creative bug spray.

  3. I never managed to grow herbs or vegetables in pots when I lived in a city. They say it can be done, but I found that they always get diseased. I would try something like geraniums next year, you can't eat them, but they keep bugs away. Your olive tree is about as big as mine. Mine flowered nicely, but now there are only TWO olives on it. Not a whole lot of oil.

  4. rorschach inkblots? sounds as exciting as brutal.

    aimee, I would have loved to see your face, man. (gardening advice, tsk.)

    francesca, I get no olives, have never had in 3 years. however, the tree has totally gone mad since I potted it on a bigger container. it bloomed even! ahora tengo un olivo feliz.

  5. I have no gardening talent, so your balcony garden looks super to me! Keep up the good work! ;-)

  6. Your garden looks fab from here where I cannot see one caterpillar! Container plants never work for me, so I am impressed... Good luck ninja -

  7. You're garden is gorgeous! I've never had caterpillar trouble (just swarms of aphids) but I would think you could make them crawl through some watercolor paints and make a nice painting. If elephant art and dog art can sell, why not caterpillars?

  8. hello lovely one!
    i'm swooning over your fanciful pictures and am simply delighted by your blog!
    thank-you for such splendid posts! x

  9. i am enjoying thinking of myself of as a non-metric nutter. and ugh to you about those little caterpillars. and that poor little tom who is a survivor. keep going, ninja. have you tried spraying with a mixture of egg and water?

    have missed you, ninja. definitely going to swing by here more often. xoxo

  10. I wanna try your blue light tomatoes...


what's that I hear (read rather)?